dawn of a new day

it's a funny feeling to have a whole year ahead of us, isn't it? it seemed from facebook and the media and just the general sense of things, that 2011 was a hard year for a lot of people. it was an exceedingly hard year for me and mitchell, and we have spent the last couple days talking a lot about the hope...so much hope... for a better year ahead. hope is precarious in so many ways - it means you stand on a precipice and look out -- one eye open -- and choose to believe that you'll be okay. it takes faith and guts and a lot of trust. i know so many of you have had challenging years...some that started out that way and got tougher or maybe better...some that started out wonderful and strong and ended on a scary and uncertain note. 

one thing i know for certain is that i'll be back here writing regularly again, which had gotten a little spotty, admittedly. so together, we'll meet 2012 with faith and guts and a lot of trust, okay? what's really the alternative, right? and while we're at it, we might as well make it look and smell lovely, taste good and make us happy. so here we go. a few thoughts to get us started.

i'm beyond thrilled that voluspa has brought back their best candle scent ever, baltic amber. apparently, i wasn't the only one miffed that they'd done away with it.

i made this classic spinach dip on new years eve just exactly the way the recipe says to, though i used light mayo and light sour cream. it was REALLY GOOD. and i totally did pack it into a bread bowl and served it with cubes of fresh sourdough. first rate.

a few weeks ago, my cousins and i had our semi-monthly cousins outing at a private "beauty bash" at the super girlie benefit boutique in soho which was so fun and such a steal! for $50, you get a brow service (thread, pluck or wax) and $50 of product credit PLUS drinks and snacks. new favorite benefit product? definitely this plum mascara.

and speaking of plum...i'm re-obsessed with essie sole mate for nails...i just feel happy every time i see my hands. heaven.

did you have any real favorite gifts this holiday season? i think these retro handsets for cell phones are hilarious and whimsical. i also love the footsie pajamas at target...i just worry a little about overheating and not having an easy exit plan...

i've watched every episode of up all night at least once this past week on my vacation, and i love it. i'm also completely caught up on tori and dean, blissfully netflix-ensconced in both mad men and parenthood and entirely excited for the return of pretty little liars, mob wives and gossip girl...WTF chuck??

bring it 2012.


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good morning

this was today's daily thought from real simple (do you subscribe?) and i liked its simplicity and truth.

wild flowers

it's so gorgeous out today isn't it? yesterday too. i always love it when mother nature gives us something like that after a weekend like we had. it's like a wink from the bright blue sky...what wind? what rain?

of course i wouldn't be feeling so flowery if i didn't have power back yet like my parents and so many other unlucky, unhappy people. i hope you get your power back as soon as humanly possible.

home sweet home

 

wouldn't this tray be the perfect housewarming, wedding or hostess gift? i love its earnestness...it's simple, but not too simple; retro, but but not overly so, and it's something that brings a smile to any surface in any home.

i really love sentiments -  like "home sweet home" -  which are so universally known and so frequently said. what i love most about them is that moment in your own life where you, unknowingly, stumble upon that very feeling...in this case, walking into the comforts of your home at the end of a long day, a trip, a special event, and that feeling, that sigh...home sweet home. and i love in those moments realizing how that universal phrase and sentiment came to be so universal.

do you love glass trays like this? read the high/low here.

99

yesterday would have my grandfather's 99th birthday and today, i just had to post about it because these brightly colored shirts, stacked all together, are an image that brings him to mind instantly. he was always wearing bold colors and no one rocked pastels better than he. also no one made lists, hummed tunes, delivered punchlines, tallied a check, dispensed advice and showed support better. molly and i discussed that we liked to think of him, on his birthday and every day, in heaven tapping his feet, making lists (never on a napkin!) and chuckling to himself about a joke he heard long ago, in yiddish.

speak up

good morning sweet readers! 

first, i want to share with you a good discovery from the weekend - dramatics nyc hair salons. it's a chain, and they have a deal where if you're willing to walk in for your appointment and walk out with wet hair, a cut is $19.99. works for me. so after meeting my lovely, pregnant college roommate for coffee and tea here, i popped in to the 74th and Columbus location of dramatics where lulu cut my hair. she did a great job and it was, sure enough, $19.99. greatest new nyc discovery ever.

but what i really want to talk about this morning is the temperature of the water when electra washed my hair (p.s. electra was a lovely girl who couldn't have been older than 17 or so, and she was wearing very thick rimmed glasses with no lenses in them. but i digress...)

it's not so much about the temperature of electra's water, per se, but more those moments we all encounter when the water is too hot or too cold or too whatever...and it takes strength and self-respect to speak up. my mind always goes back to a lesson my mom taught me a long time ago of never being afraid to speak up for yourself. the two examples she used are ones i'll always remember because, in one form or another, these situations arise day after day throughout our lives.

1. babysitting money - never be afraid to ask for money you worked for. when my mom said it, it was about being paid $5 an hour for watching a kid who never stopped crying or asking for soy milk. today, it's about any number of things and no matter how hard you know you work or how generously you know you lent, asking for money isn't easy, is it?

2. the water at the beauty parlor - my mom taught me not sit and wince through a too-hot shampoo...it's your head and your body and you need to make sure that you're being good to it. well, that lesson has a lot more history and baggage for me, and is something i'm still learning every day, and is even more complicated, to me, than the money one.

but this time when i sat down, i told little electra just what i needed. i said "i usually like the water pretty cool," and she made the water nice and cool, checking in with me so it was just the way i liked it.

i felt proud in that moment that i spoke up comfortably for what my head and my body needed and i felt thankful that my mom taught me that lesson good and young, even though i might first be learning it for myself now.

do you feel awkward speaking up in money or hot water situations?

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the great unknown

i love this photo from photographer lauren brooks. i feel like it really captures a sense of wonder and curiosity about what lies ahead. i remember a sad time in my life where my father did his best to convince me that one day i would see the uncertainty and not knowing of life to be the most exciting part, which seemed ridiculous and highly unlikely to me at the time. this year is really the first time i've ever believed that, at least as an adult, probably largely because of my decision to have weight loss surgery and all the changes and possibilities it brings with it.

do you feel excited by the unknown? scared? hopeful?

take care

when we were growing up, my sister molly was really neat and i was quite the opposite. she took good care of all her things, kept a tidy room and regularly dusted the dashboard of her car when she got one. my room and my car were both train wrecks. like, scary. think tunnels to walk through.

since then, i've improved quite a bit - i've learned the pleasures of a clean space, and i believe in the link between positive self-care and caring for your surroundings. so it always makes me smile when i sit across from this one woman on the train. she meticulously goes through the same routine each time she settles in. she sorts through her bag, putting things where they belong...she applies her makeup and handcream, wiping off each bottle and tube before putting it away. then she takes out her sunglasses and cleans them carefully. the care she uses with everything she owns reminds me of a little girl who takes impeccable care of her dolls, and as an adult, i respect it because i believe it connects to the way we care for ourselves.

i try to remember the examples of the train lady and my sister as i go through the world with all my stuff. i try to respect the money spent on things, the time spent creating them and my own enjoyment of owning them. all those things warrant extra care in their care.

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family recipes

isn't this the sweetest idea? it's a recipe scrapbook with old, handwritten recipe cards and notes and family photos to correspond. i've long had the idea of putting together something like this with the help of my grandmother, mother and sister and i think this image just put me over the edge.


while martha's version involves the original cards, the creation of slots and probably more DIY skill than i have, my idea is to create multiples of the book i make using great images of the originals. by doing it this way, we'll still get the original handwriting and the color of the weathered paper and ink, but we can make several books and give one to each home in the family. of course, the originals will be kept safely where time won't hurt them.

i don't know if there could be something more special in the kitchen of any home than a carefully bound curation of the recipes and meals that have traced the history of a family, in handwriting generations old, on paper that has seen other centuries.

keep calm and carry on

isn't this photo amazing? such a frozen moment in time. it's from anna at absolutely beautiful things and is a picture of the aftermath of a recent flood in brisbane.

and there's that now ubiquitous graphic sign...keep calm and carry on. among chaos and loss and grief. we can all relate to this feeling...sometimes it's events happening in the world that we're all in together, and sometimes it's struggles in our families, our social circles, our marriages, even just within our own minds and souls. but i think the feelings are universal. the notion that we can put one foot in front of the other and just move forward is a powerful one, and often easier said than done.

pretty stunning visual, isn't it?

fit to be wed

by now you know i'm not overly sentimental about wedding dresses, which is not to say i don't think they matter. they totally do, and i had my own custom made, so it's not as if i think they should be a small situation, it's more that i just don't think they need to be anything other than what their wearer wants to wear. and then the whole preservation deal...that seems overly sentimental to my taste, but then i also dyed mine black and wore it someone else's wedding, so there's that too. here's the dress mine was based on (not bridal, and black...see how things come full circle?):

as far as preservation, you could do something really subtle and reasonable like framing it and hanging it in your ginormo closet, like adrienne maloof did. if your closet is a little smaller than adrienne's, consider these beautiful sketches as a...smaller... way to preserve your gown, and then donate it to others in need. or sell it. whatevs.

i think some brides feel pressure to wear something that's not "them" for their wedding day, so they get pushed into a dress that's, well, not them. so i totally adore the idea of a bride who doesn't want an overly bridal dress getting one that's not meant to be bridal at all. do you think you'd feel comfortable doing that or would you feel (or maybe your mom or husband or sister would feel) like this was your moment to wear a WEDDING dress so you have to do it? i think if a bride wants a full, beaded, sparkling confection, that's what she should have. and if she doesn't, and would prefer a lavender column that makes her feel most like herself, then that's what she should have. i think the notion of feeling "bridal" gets bastardized - you should feel like your best, most beautiful, happiest self as a bride -- the same way you should feel about becoming a wife. okay, so i guess maybe i do feel a little sentimental about wedding dresses...just not in the way that calls for bedazzled tiaras.

so with all that said, take a look at these dresses fit to be wed in, that say nary a word about being a wedding dress...

first, check out this amazing halston heritage dress. can you believe?

and it comes in "rose gold," a romantic blush version.

it also comes in azurey gunmetal and what about this amazeballs option? hello, something blue. by choosing something blue, you can have your traditional cake and eat it too.

also, from halston heritage, i'm obsessed with this saks exclusive...

and this valentino number? this is like, city hall glam, don't you think?

and what if you could spend $165 on a wedding dress and not have it be one you've seen before or one that's seen better days (and nicer fabric)? this backstage glam rock mini would be so fun for a certain kind of bride.

the etro balloon sleeve cutout dress is just so different and special that in some ways, only a bride could wear it, don't you think?


the cecelia gown from j. crew looks more bridal than the others, but its simplicity and under $500 cost seem so liberating and beautiful. i feel like many brides would love this dress but might be deterred by it being so cheap and so decidedly unbridal.

also from j. crew but not in white, i think the arabelle dress in graphite is so pretty and could be accessorized with lots of bridal white for such a sweet and different look.

i just think it's freeing to think about things in different ways than we always have, which is also what had me thinking about bling last week.

what are your thoughts?

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private lives: breakfast

do you ever think how we know so much about each other now because of things like facebook and twitter and all the real-time communication? it's funny - we're privy to little details and glimpses into one anothers' lives that were previously private and yet, some things that aren't private at all really, we don't know because we're just not together every second of the day. for instance, do you know what your friends eat for breakfast? i don't know what anyone in my life eats for breakfast other than my husband (and that's nothing, which it really shouldn't be since we know breakfast is important, but anyway...)

i was inspired by the first two images on this post, hali bey's photography on concrete magnolia, and they got me thinking about the tastes that start our days. then i easily found more such images on martha's site (i like hali's way better). so i'll go first...these days, i eat half of a plain fage 2% greek yogurt with a heaping tablespoon of sugar free red raspberry preserves mixed in. and of course coffee.

what do you eat for breakfast? i'd love to know.

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happy weekend

isn't this the sweetest sentiment? granted, there's not much sun to be had here in the northeast, and certainly no laying anywhere outside, but i love the thought of taking note of all the beauty around us, even in the midst of stress and snow and traffic and illness and fear and doubt and the general difficulties that life sometimes brings.

i hope you have a wonderful weekend.

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some like it cold

i prefer iced coffee regardless of the weather. there, i said it.

yes, there are exceptions. sometimes i love a good hot cup, especially with the milk frothed. but i'm just more of an iced coffee kind of girl, and i'm okay with that. i'm okay with the strange looks i get from the coffee guy in the morning when it's snowing and i want it cold. i'm okay with the confusion i see on peoples' faces when i sip what is clearly iced coffee, thanks to the sound of the ice, from a hot coffee cup since i can't use straws since my surgery (too much air). clearly, i'm not the only one with this preference, since despite the crazy looks, the coffee guy always has iced coffee in the dead of winter - it can't just be for me.

it reminds me of the great glamour magazine feature "hey, it's okay!" so, it's okay that i like iced coffee even when the very lid i drink it from collects a quarter inch of cold, icy snow. and it's okay -- great, even -- that i just push the icy snow right into the cup.

do you have a somewhat weird thing you're just okay with?

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here birdie

how sweet is this little ceramic bird?

and how about his little brother in black?

to me, there's always something charming about little bird figurines...i think because you get the sense of looking up close when he or she is perfectly still which so rarely happens in real life, even for the most avid birdwatchers.

especially on a cold, snowy day like today here in new york, it's nice to be reminded that warm-bodied little birds will soon be back in town to forage and flap their way into spring.

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january stream of consciousness

my mind is in a zillion places this week, and there's so much i want to talk about with you that i have to just give it over to a stream of consciousness post...hope you're cool with that.

holly, of decor8 fame, says it best here on her other blog haus maus about the rush of thoughts that comes with the new year.

so, mitchell did an incredible job of organizing and decluttering at home while he was off from work last work, including my most favorite thing of all - he repurposed our now not-in-use bar cart as a "mancaddy," (his word. love.)

i have once again discovered the virtues of a light mani. loving mademoiselle right now. so sheer, so pale, almost too much so, but not quite. instead, it's perfect. next time, i plan on using an extra dose of top coat for super shine. i got said mani and threw in a pedi too, the first winter one i've had in a few years, i have to say, and it was glorious. the hot water and hot steam cloths felt even more luxurious with snow piled up outside. the pedi was totally necessary because...

i was starting yoga and had been forewarned that it was practiced barefoot. i took my first class with both of my parents (my mom almost couldn't control her laughter at one point) and it was great. so much harder than i thought it would be, but very gratifying too, and something i'm looking forward to getting good at. we went to a lovely little studio called om sweet om where they offer many, many yoga classes, acupuncture, chiropractic and meditation and reiki, which you might rememeber from my pre-surgical reiki healing circle experience. i loved all the yoga talk of balancing, sharing the weight of each pose evenly throughout one's body and quieting the mind while strengthening the body.

afterwards, we sat for a cup of coffee at sweet comfort cafe, a coffee shop in town that is so cozy and nice, and has the added appeal of providing employment opportunities for developmentally disabled adults, a population which has a 92% unemployment rate in new york state.

aside from copious amounts of decaf coffee with lots of skim, one of my favorite snacks has become blue diamond's 100 calorie packs of wasabi and soy almonds. spicy, a little sweet and very satisfying.

jennifer aniston's favorite snack is white peaches and string cheese. no wonder she looks like this.

and speaking of string cheese, have you tried the fresh mozzarella sticks from trader joe's? great invention.

and speaking of trader joe's, have you seen these cookbooks? we all know how great TJ's is, but these clever books aggregate some of the best TJ's finds and instruct on how to use them for easy cooking and entertaining. loves it.

another great healthy thing i've discovered, thanks to my loyal reader and awesome aunt jackie, is plain nonfat greek yogurt with some sugar free (or low sugar) jelly or preserves mixed in. since i haven't fully experimented with fresh fruit yet since my surgery, this is a great solution.

another jackie suggestion is exclusively recording shows you love in the room where you work out so you have to work out to watch them. desperate housewives here i come. and most of the own network lineup, you too. i also plan on recording khloe and lamar's show in there, with the rest of its kardashian brethren (or sisterhood, as it were).

and speaking of the treadmill, i was on it at 9:30 at night on new year's eve. now THAT'S the sign of a new year, i'd say.

namaste.

what are you thinking about this week?

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the forever files

are there a few things you have that you've had forever? i get a secret pleasure out of those items in my life. one of the first that comes to mind is this pair of mocassin-style winter boots. i wear them into the ground every winter, and to freshen them up after year 4, i snipped off the dangling pom-poms that had started to look a little ratty. each year when it's time to break them out, i'm happy to see them again - like an old friend you see each year when the season brings you together at camp or your favorite vacation spot.

the fact that i bought them at payless almost ten years ago for under $20 makes it that much more thrilling. i've bypassed the entire uggs phase because i could never justify buying a pair that would serve the exact same purpose as the ones i already have, and truly, i've been perfectly happy with mine.

exhibit b: my alarm clock has been with me since my senior year of high school. same clock i used to set for 6:46 every morning. it's seen so many homes - my bedroom at my parents' house, two dorm rooms, one sorority house room, one college apartment room, my bedroom at my parents' house again (and then again), my single girl city apartment, the first bedroom that mitchell and i shared and the second, and now the third. the same clock! part of the thrill with that one is just that it's lastest this long...(and why don't i have an ipod or cell phone that can claim the same thing?)

little things mean a lot, and for me, the boots and the clock are two of those things. they are remnants of earlier roads i've walked, earlier steps on my journey, and though i don't always think of them this deeply, i smile whenever i realize their longevity and i suspect the thrill comes from a place deeper than frugality or efficiency.

i fully plan on getting a new pair of boots one day (preferably ones that keep my feet dry as well as warm) and mitchell bought me a new alarm clock with all kinds of meditative sounds and settings which is more fitting of my life and goals today. but these things will be with me for a long time still, tucked away on a shelf or in a closet; i never know when i'll need to walk a mile in my old shoes, or be in need a wake-up call (at 6:46 or any other time); i never know when i'll need a backup or a change of pace or just a sweet reminder of a different time.

what have you had forever?

remember the rituals

starbucks always has good one-liners...i love that when they serve you your coffee they say "let me know if your drink's not perfect." it's not even just posted on a sign somewhere - they say it!

so i wasn't at all surprised to see a sign on the door recently that said "take comfort in rituals." AMEN. isn't a good ritual something we can all take such comfort it? whether it's the way you make the bed in the morning, the few minutes you sit quietly and sip a hot tea, even where you place your keys, your umbrella, your wallet when you get home at the end of a long day.

often, the first things to go when we're stressed out or overtired are the rituals and routines that keep us grounded and sane. i know when i'm rushing around in the morning, running late, my inclination is to skip the 2 minutes to make the bed - that's 2 minutes i could use somewhere else. but it's the wrong choice, i've learned, in so many ways. first, the simple act of taking that 2 minutes is calming - it makes me feel more in control, and reminds me to put one foot in front of the other and take it easy on myself a little. it also makes me feel less frenzied when i'm turning off the light and leaving the room, knowing i'm leaving a neat, calm bed behind me.

and when i return home after the long day i rushed to, it's a terrible feeling to walk into a bedroom in disarray. it's far better to be welcomed by a pretty, relaxing space - a small but crucial reward for a day of doing and going. other than in some filmic sliding doors situation, that 2 minutes doesn't slow me down very much and certainly doesn't affect monumental change, but skipping it could change everything.

another ritual i have been loving recently is my ikea milk frother which you might remember me talking about as a tiny treasure last year. it makes the milk frothy but not hot, and gives a whole new level of luxury to the morning cup. in all seriousness, you need to get one. and they're $1.99.

for more on rituals and keeping our heads on straight during the holiday rush, read on.

at sea

i am not afraid of storms, for i am learning how to sail my ship.
--louisa may alcott

image from free desktop backgrounds

nighty night

nightstands are kind of like a little apartment within your home, right? they're self-contained, just a lovely little tableau of whatever happens your first and last moments awake each day.

here's what's on mine:

-an alarm clock i've had since high school
-a small crystal bowl my grandpa gave me which holds rubber bands and odds and ends
-a glittery silver box for my rings
-a bottle of lavender and vanilla pillow mist
-a box i painted in mexico to hold my inner child - story for another day
-a face-shaped box from my grandma which holds q-tips
-a book or two and my blackberry
-anywhere between one and four water bottles at varying levels of fullness

i'm curious to know...what's on your nightstand?

image from house beautiful