Tuesday, April 26, 2011

speak up

good morning sweet readers! 

first, i want to share with you a good discovery from the weekend - dramatics nyc hair salons. it's a chain, and they have a deal where if you're willing to walk in for your appointment and walk out with wet hair, a cut is $19.99. works for me. so after meeting my lovely, pregnant college roommate for coffee and tea here, i popped in to the 74th and Columbus location of dramatics where lulu cut my hair. she did a great job and it was, sure enough, $19.99. greatest new nyc discovery ever.

but what i really want to talk about this morning is the temperature of the water when electra washed my hair (p.s. electra was a lovely girl who couldn't have been older than 17 or so, and she was wearing very thick rimmed glasses with no lenses in them. but i digress...)

it's not so much about the temperature of electra's water, per se, but more those moments we all encounter when the water is too hot or too cold or too whatever...and it takes strength and self-respect to speak up. my mind always goes back to a lesson my mom taught me a long time ago of never being afraid to speak up for yourself. the two examples she used are ones i'll always remember because, in one form or another, these situations arise day after day throughout our lives.

1. babysitting money - never be afraid to ask for money you worked for. when my mom said it, it was about being paid $5 an hour for watching a kid who never stopped crying or asking for soy milk. today, it's about any number of things and no matter how hard you know you work or how generously you know you lent, asking for money isn't easy, is it?

2. the water at the beauty parlor - my mom taught me not sit and wince through a too-hot shampoo...it's your head and your body and you need to make sure that you're being good to it. well, that lesson has a lot more history and baggage for me, and is something i'm still learning every day, and is even more complicated, to me, than the money one.

but this time when i sat down, i told little electra just what i needed. i said "i usually like the water pretty cool," and she made the water nice and cool, checking in with me so it was just the way i liked it.

i felt proud in that moment that i spoke up comfortably for what my head and my body needed and i felt thankful that my mom taught me that lesson good and young, even though i might first be learning it for myself now.

do you feel awkward speaking up in money or hot water situations?


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